高考一结束,我走出校门,看到爸爸眼睛红红的,我以为他是觉得女儿成功熬过了高考而感动,但没想到是一个晴天霹雳。“昨天你考试的时候,你奶奶死了。”我大脑一片空白,感觉要窒息了。“为了不影响你高考,她临死前都让我别跟你说,跟我去医院吧。”妈妈走了过来扶住瘫倒的我,“什么?她死了?快让我一起过去”。爸爸有些诧异的看着妈妈,好多年不见了,但情绪在此时全部糅为老人去世的低落中,大家都没说什么,静静地坐车去了医院。一块白布铺在奶奶身上,我丢下书包就抱着那具尸体“奶奶,奶奶!”走廊上回荡着我的惨叫声,妈妈抹了眼泪,爸爸也嘶哑着低沉的声音啜泣。一年前爷爷去世的时候我没见爸爸哭,几个姑姑哭的跟泪人似的。可能是作为一个没有能力的长兄的面子,他不能哭,也许他偷偷地哭了但我们不知道。但这次奶奶去世,他没忍住,低嚎着。我哭了一晚上,直到哭不出来了为止,如果时间能重来,我宁愿放弃高考去见奶奶最后一面。
奶奶和爷爷合葬在了一起,“慈母荣独秀,父王朝阳之墓,生于一九四五年三月二十六日,一九四零年一月一日,故于二零一五年六月七日,二零一四年二月二十六日”。我们穿着黑色的衣服,为两位老人默哀。这天晴晴的,和煦的阳光照在我的脸上,我仿佛听到奶奶的呼唤“思儿,好好活,别活得像我们一样,想做什么就做吧,奶奶在天上永远支持你。”
“谢谢你,奶奶。感谢你为我留下了那么多宝贵的人生态度和财富,你让我知道了人无完人的道理,不完美的你却也是最完美的奶奶。走好。”
☆、第九章:怀念
好久没有回到“星星的思念”,这里即将被重建,包括我生活的居民区和对面那片别墅,我们家得到了一笔拆迁费,爷爷奶奶的遗产加上爸爸攒的和借的一些钱让我们住在了北京的海淀区的电梯房里。这里离北京北站和故宫都不远,交通便利了许多,我实现了在北京的旅游自由。不论是家庭还是自己,我都不再像小时候那样自卑了。我如愿的考进了北京外国语大学,爸爸扬眉吐气地在亲戚朋友面前摆了酒席炫耀了一番。自从结婚了以后,他大半辈子都抬不起头,因为我他终于神气了一次。他不了解我为了高考付出了多大的心血,我有几次差点熬夜到昏厥,月经失调,经常看花眼。北京的学生都拼了命地学习,我只能比他们更卖命,才能不输人。这个社会,没有背景,没有社会地位,你就只能靠自己的一大步和别人的一小步持平了,这就是命。如果再让我经历一次高中,我宁愿选择折寿。
我从背包里拿出一个尘封已久的盒子,都是她留给我的,最后那点想念。几年了?整整三年了吧,我没有再打开看过。对她的歉意和离开的一丝埋怨现在也都烟消云散了,只不过看着这个盒子我心里苦苦的,竟有些犹豫要不要打开。“都要彻底离开这里了,这片草地也要消失了,不如今天就彻底结束掉这份念想”我打开盒子,一张过时的圣诞卡片,一封信,一本绘画册和一些小礼物。圣诞卡片我还记得,当时我只看懂了中文,是祝我圣诞快乐的话。英文是什么呢,
“rry christas! y girly love for you ,flyg fro korea to atralia, across the ountas of arica, then across the vast atntic ocean, and around to chahope you are always happy”(圣诞快乐,女孩。我对你的爱从韩国飞到澳大利亚,穿过美洲的层层山脉,广阔的大西洋,绕过一圈来到中国。希望你永远开心),她真是个浪漫的小天使。“ , !”(你是我在中国认识的第一个朋友,爱你哦!)。我的脸上洋溢着笑意,这张卡片不自觉的把我拉向了六年级的那个冬天,没什么雪花,但有她,给了我力量去改变,去做自己。
还有一张信!我还记得我很恨自己没有早点发现那封信。“, ! ”(王思,你好!我是罗念星。我从来没想过短短几天就遇到这么好的朋友,我们就像姐妹一样!你是我重要的存在,即使我回到了澳大利亚,去了韩国也依然会想起你。不要忘了我,我爱你。)
“i want to share a story with you: once upon a ti, a little girl followed her faily fro korea to atralia, but eventually they iigrated to atraliashe loves ic and passed an tervieith i entertant to bee an traee as long as she can endure hardship, she can start her career as an idol sger, like a k-pop star on tvthe price is that she will be away fro her faily for at least three years, perhaps longerwhen she was a child south korea, ostracized by her cs□□ates becae she was half-korean so boys ughed at her for beg half-korean, and the girl also isoted her becae of her existenceshe was afraid to tell her other becae she was afraid she would be sad, but whenever the boy poted at her and said she was chese, she would rebel, 。"i a korean!please don。't say that about !。"after that, i was afraid of cha she thought chese people were not so friendly except for her otheruntil isheca to cha, grandpa, nanny aunt, any, any chese people are very niceckily, she t a chese angel girl, who had beautiful eyes and a free soulalthough they e fro different untries and have different cultural backgrounds, they talk about everythg and get along like failyeager to ake friends, she cherished the chese girl and gradually fell love with her sthey were both born the sa year she knew that such feelgs were different fro friendsshe has good friends korea and atralia, but for this chese girl, she knows she has a different feelg and she wants to be with a chese girl forevershe was precio, but she didn。't have a boyfriend at schoolthe chese girl has any ideas that she agrees with she is very clever and lovely, huoro and polite, and nsiderate of the korean girl。's shortg cheseher beautiful eyes and terestg soul attract the korean girl and ake the korean girl fall love with here slept together at night, the korean girl uld not help but turn on the light and ietly looked at the chese girlwith long eyeshes and a iet sleepg face, she uld not help kissg the chese girl she knew that the chese girl found it and nervoly turned off the light and went to sleepshe woke up very early and wrote this letter to the chese girlthe next day she would leave for atralia, then say goodbye to everyone and go to korea alone to pursue her dreasshe uldn。't bear to see the chese girl she fell love with her”